When I was much younger I participated in gymnastics for 8 years before finally realizing I’m not at all comfortable with throwing my body off a trampoline and into the air; especially backwards. I turned to ballet and after my first class I immediately fell in love.
After 4+ years of no dance classes I’m finally checking “learn how to tap” off my bucket list. I thought my youth filled of gymnastics and ballet would give me the foundation I would need to start dancing again. Wrong-Oh! I was sufficiently humbled within the first few minute into class. Afterwards, at home that night, the only thought that kept me from quitting was the fact I had spent a good amount of my budget on my new shoes and I need to at least get my money’s worth out of them. I’d never struggled with dance before, so learning tap has made me focus extra hard so my brain can keep up with the staccato movement of my toes, feet, ankles, etc. Phew!
On my way to class last week, I gave my self a pep talk while driving. Told myself, “Self, after only two classes you’ve already decided you’re bad at tap, so you’re not gonna get any better until you allow your thoughts to be better.”
My whole life I’ve struggled with this thought pattern. If something requires a little more work and effort than I originally planned, I blame myself and want to quit. Either I’m not good enough or wasn’t prepared enough and should bow out gracefully with whatever dignity I have left. Again, wrong-oh! Action’s start with an idea, and an idea stems from a thought. The magic pill isn’t necessarily to grin and bare it, muscle your way through while hoping for the best. The fault doesn’t lie with the ability to perform said action. What we need to change isn’t ourselves; it is our thoughts.
Trust me, I know it’s easier said than done. But I found, after my pep talk into tap class, I enjoyed the experience of learning a little bit more. I wasn’t completely hung up on what I saw as my failures. I realized I remembered more, the movement felt more familiar, and I wasn’t so stuck in my head. I’m still a baby-beginner-tap-dancer but I’m a teensy bit better than I was three weeks ago. Hopefully in another three weeks, I’ll be a little bit stronger.
My mom summed it up perfectly as I was explaining this experience to her. She said, “It’s not that it’s harder, it’s just something new that requires a little more time to learn.”
Whether it’s learning how to tap dance, landing your dream job, or trying anything new remember to go easy on yourself. You may not be where you want to be at the moment, but at least you’re headed in the right direction.
Keep moving forward.
Sarah Lorna
SARAH LORNA BAILEY 